Do forgive my lack of updates.  I haven't had very much to say.

Unfortunately, such is still the case.  Which is why instead of telling a story of my own, I will ask the rest of you to tell me your stories.

I want to know about your most scandalous moment.  It doesn't have to be sex-related, though I'm sure most of them will be.  Tell me about a moment in your life that you look back on now and chuckle to yourself because it's your dirty little secret.

For instance:

I once had the pleasure of sharing a bed with two men (one of them my boyfriend, the other his friend), and all three of us were topless.  Believe it or not, we were not having sex with one another.  Though I must admit...at one point in the night, one had his hand on my breast, and the other had his hand in my crotch.  It was quite amusing, and very much a turn-on, if I do say so myself.

All right, now it's your turn.  Tell me your most "scandalous" moment. 

~Rachel

...and she is 53.  It appears I was a bit off in my guess, but oh well.  Doesn't phase me much.  She really doesn't look her age in the slightest.  I'm sure she probably thought I was crazy, although she didn't come out and say it.  All she did was answer me and then ask me my age.  Smiling as always.  Such a pretty smile...But there I go again.

I suppose that's really all I had to say.  Farewell for now.

~Rachel

For those of you keeping track, though I can't imagine why:  Yes I am still with my boyfriend.  Although my current love situation has gotten far more complicated, what I am about to say has absolutely nothing to do with all that.  This entry is about the current object of my sexual desires.  Though it truly pains me to refer to her as an "object".  Such an exquisite woman should never be referred to as an object.  (To clarify:  This is not someone that I love in a romantic way.  Merely an infatuation.  This is someone that I know I can never have.  I am content with fantasizing about her and then fucking myself until I am blue in the face.  But I am getting ahead of myself.)

Christina....lovely Christina.  She's so beautiful.  Even her name sounds beautiful.  Go ahead and say it out loud a few times if you don't believe me.  She's such an elegant woman.  She's a good bit older than I am, I'd say at least 10 or 15 years.  All right, perhaps it's closer to 20.  I don't know, I've never asked.  Do I normally go for "older" women?  Not really.  I'm just so completely enamored with this woman that her age doesn't bother me.  Age doesn't bother me much anyhow, but I digress. 

What is it about her that I find so attractive?  There are several things, actually.  She's extremely intelligent and well-educated, she's friendly and pleasant to be around, she has a lovely face and her body's not half-bad either.  But the one thing that attracted me to her from the very moment I met her was....you're all going to laugh at me....her voice.  The very sound of her voice turns me on almost instantly.  I swear she has the most beautiful voice I've ever heard in my entire life. It's so melodic.  When she speaks, I'm in heaven.   

I can tell just from the vibes she gives off that she truly enjoys sex (not to mention she may have a bit of a kinky side), but hasn't had any in quite some time.  If I weren't such a God-damned chicken, I'd offer my services to her.  And of course, if she would come on to me, I would consent in a heartbeat.  Alas, neither one of those things is likely to happen.  So I must continue only to dream of fucking her and eating her pussy.  I wonder if she's loud when she cums.  I bet she is.

Now that I've gotten myself thoroughly hot and bothered, I will go take care of that and then go to sleep.  I wish you all a pleasant evening.

~Rachel

I have been with my current boyfriend for nearly eight months now.  During this time, I have been completely emotionally faithful to him.  I can't exactly say the same for physically, but I have toned it down a great deal.  While we lived in the same area, I didn't fool around with anyone else.  Actually I take that back.  I only fooled around with one person.  It wasn't often, and my boyfriend never found me out.  I'm very glad he didn't, because I really want this relationship to work.  Why then do I feel the need to be with others, you ask?  I suppose I'm just greedy for pleasureable company, both in bed and out.  *shrug*  But once again, I digress.

I think I should clarify something:  When I say "fooling around", I mean nothing past oral sex.  My current boyfriend is the only person I've ever had intercourse with, and I'm doing my absolute best to keep it that way.

Back to the topic:  So now I find myself once again in a long-distance relationship, after having to move away temporarily.  We visit each other from time to time, and we make the most of our visits, in more ways than one.  In the time we've been apart, I have had two playmates.  I made it easy on myself this time:  I didn't lie about having a boyfriend.  They both knew I wasn't available, and that I had nothing more to offer than companionship and physical intimacy.  Nevertheless, it wasn't long before I dropped them both.  One of them was quite annoying, plus he was getting extremely attached.  (He still is, truthfully, to the point where I'm starting to get mad.)  The other was just a complete asshole.  Enough said. 

Since those two, I have not had any playmates.  I won't go so far as to say I will not have any more during my stay here, because I honestly don't know.  I will say that I'm not making an effort to look for replacements.  Whatever happens happens. 

Now, however, I have a different situation.  There is a guy at school that I knew purely on an acquaintance level at first.  Some time last week, he and I started up a conversation, and we really hit it off.  I could tell he really liked me, and truthfully I liked him as well.  The old me would have pretended to be single just so I could date him.  Though I am no saint, I am also not the old me.  So I was going to tell him that I had a boyfriend.  But let's be real here:  Unless the other person asks, it's not the easiest thing to work into a casual conversation.  So by yesterday, I still hadn't been able to tell him.  I finally just came out and said it.  He was disappointed, but also glad that I told him.  Thankfully he wanted to remain friends, and he even kept our "date" that we have next week.  (Meeting up for lunch)

I suppose it went well, overall.  Though I admit:  Part of me wishes I had lied.  There's no possible way I could have gotten away with it, and I know this.  But I can't help but want him for myself.  He's a really great guy.  Don't misunderstand:  I don't like him enough to leave my boyfriend for him.  But still.  It would have been nice to make him mine.  *shrug*  Oh well.  Can't have everything I want, I suppose.  I'm grateful to still have his companionship, in any case. 

I believe I've said enough on this topic for now.

~Rachel

First things first:  As many of you have likely figured out, this blog won't be updated daily.  However, I will try not to let too much time go by between updates. 

As I stated in my profile, I do have a boyfriend, as well as a "playmate" or two sometimes.  It's a long-distance relationship, and sometimes I just need a bit of company.  I'm not trying to justify my actions, merely explain them somewhat.  With my "playmates", it's not just about fulfilling my sexual desires.  Really, I most long for their companionship.  I don't fool around with random people.  It's just not my style.  My "playmates", or "really good friends" as one of them called himself, always start out as friends.  Don't misunderstand:  I don't become physically intimate with all of my male friends.  And I truly don't plan it to happen.  Sometimes the attraction and chemistry is just there after all that time.  But I digress.

In my younger days, I suppose I was what you'd call a "player".  I had a different boyfriend back then, and it was also a long-distance relationship.  While I was in college, I dated other people besides him.  He did not mind as long as I told him everything (it was an open relationship), but I didn't always do that.  I was quite the liar back then.  Afraid to upset him or make him jealous, I would tell him that I didn't have any romantic feelings for such-and-such person, when in truth I did.  And the person in question had no idea about my boyfriend.  I would lie and say that I was single.  I don't claim to be an outstandingly moral person, but I will admit that I am ashamed of my actions back then.  What made me truly guilty was that every last one of them fell in love with me, and several of them wanted to marry me.  It was truly a mess.

At the time when I met my current boyfriend, I was dating three people at once, all of them getting more serious with each passing day.  Once I realized that I was falling for what would eventually be my current boyfriend, I broke up with the other three, one by one.  It truly pained me to break their hearts, but I could see that I was living a lie--no, three lies.  Truthfully, I would have broken up with two of them anyway, because it just wasn't working out.  One took it far worse than all the others, but that is a completely different story.  For the first time in a good while, I was truthfully single.  I did not tell my current boyfriend any of this, because I wanted to start with a clean slate. 

Hmm, this update is turning out longer than I planned.  I will take a break for now, and come back later to finish what I was trying to say.

~Rachel